Gathering my bearings
This week marked the 44th Independence Day for Barbados. I meant to post about it, but I couldn’t muster the energy.
This week marked the end of NaNoWriMo 2010. I lasted about a week and a half into the month. I could never find a groove for my novel. I meant to post about what I learned from the experience but I couldn’t muster the energy.
This week marked World AIDS Day. I didn’t forget about it. I didn’t get to go to any events marking the observance. I meant to post about it but I couldn’t muster the energy.
This week marked a personal crisis for me. The kind of crisis that led me to Youtube so I could listen to Nina Simone songs, with a hint of Nancy Sinatra and Gladys Knight. The kind of crisis that has me questioning my past, present and future. What’s interesting to me is that I seem to be handling this crisis with a degree of calm and patience that I would have found ludicrous in my younger days. What’s frightening to me is the possibility that my calm and patience aren’t really calm and patience. Because really, I should be gnashing my teeth and rending my clothes. I should be shut up in a darkened room somewhere crying my eyes out. Instead, I’m being reasonable. I’m making smiley faces at Baby E. I’m continuing life as close to normal as possible.
I’m holding onto the bottom and trying my damnedest to make sure it doesn’t fall out from under me.