Da Bear

Mama Bear came out swinging this weekend!

Well…more like yelling but she was definitely swinging on the inside.

Baby E and I were enjoying road trip #2 this weekend with a bunch of birth-minded women whom we joined to go see the most famous (and probably awesome) midwife in the world. We ended up having a dinner in a lovely little restaurant which as it turns out did not have very family-friendly restrooms, i.e. no changing table or ledge in sight. I discovered this when Baby E’s diaper (yes, a disposable one…we still do cloth at home) didn’t quite do it’s job of keeping baby pee inside and not outside of the diaper. So, with no changing area in the bathroom, coupled with the fact that it was about 30 degrees Farenheit outside, I decided to change him at the table. Notice, I did not say change him on the table. I changed him on my lap. He was never completely naked at anytime even though I had to change his entire outfit. In fact when it came to the actual diaper change part of it, I did that part pretty quickly and positioned him in such a way that he didn’t flash anyone. Then, in order to soothe my child who hates to be changed, I breastfed him. And yes, I was completely covered the whole time.

While I was changing Baby E, I noticed that the woman seated at the table BEHIND the table next to ours was saying something about me to the little girl she was with. I mostly ignored her because I wasn’t sure if she was being negative or just being observant and explaining something to the little girl. I finished nursing my son and was getting ready to pay my tab when this woman walked up to me, leaned into my face and said in the most snide tone I’ve heard in a while, “I don’t mind that you breastfed your baby, but how dare you change him in front of me!!!

I felt my chest start to pound. My mouth started to drop. Before I knew it I was yelling at her while she was walking away from me as fast as she could. I think I said something like, “Until they put a family table in the restroom, then you can talk to me about my child, you silly woman!”  I didn’t even realize that I was yelling until I noticed the whole restaurant was staring at me. But I didn’t care. In fact I stood up and almost went after her to say more but my thinking brain took over from my alligator brain and I just strapped my little one into his carseat instead. When the tears began to prick my eyelids I knew I was indeed pissed.

Amazingly, no one chided me about that situation. My tablemates surrounded us with love and support. A woman with a baby at the table behind us offered to breastfeed and then change her baby right there in support of us. The wait staff was apologetic about what happened. A man at the table next to us described the offensive woman to one of the servers.

The funny thing is, I’d always wondered if I would ever be confronted about nursing my son in public and how I would react. This person took care to point out that the nursing didn’t bother her. Although if it didn’t bother her, then why bring it up?

So yes, my mama bear does exist and she’ll turn this confrontation-avoiding navelgazer into something ferocious.

I worried at first that I had set a bad example for Baby E but seeing as I did not physically assault this woman and I managed to refrain from cursing, I think I did a pretty good job of standing up for the both of us. The bonus is that he smiled at me when all was said and done.

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Posted on December 7, 2009, in Breastfeeding, Cloth diapers, Mother instinct, New mommyhood, Random bits from my life and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. You know, folks kill me sometimes. I would love to ask these ignorant folks sometimes what in the hell they expect a parent to do in these situations. What would they do?

    Oh, the breastfeeding absolutely bothered her. It was the last straw. “Oh, first she’s changing diapers and now she wants to breastfeed?!?”

    I’m always amazed at the hostility towards children in this society.

  2. yea if i was there i would have been in her ass got you sis!!!! cuz thats like saying, “how dare you take your child to tha bathroom and feed him in public!!” oh tha hell….i use to change Bookie anywhere and whipped out my boobs when she was hungry…i didnt care! its not like you put my lil man man on tha table she was eatin at! ugh! i cant stand ppl sometimes! but you did right…and i commend you for it BIG SIS! stand up for my lil man!

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